The Furiously Fragmented Feral Feline
(OR - "That Cat's A Freakin' NUTBAG!")
|Website:||The FERAL ONE'S Zazzle Store, "OuterBohemia"|
|Location:||Virginia Beach, Virginia, United States|
its kind of complicated.
~ Outer Bohemia ~
Unique merchandise featuring
her own original artwork
i am the most bewildering, most EXTREME case of personality contradictions & behavior that could be possible.
I am hot & cold - tender/sensitive/caring/compassionate - then cold-blooded/merciless/evil.
You'd really think me multiple personality. But Im not.
Just bi-polar & post-traumatized.
I have a BLAST with both conditions too!
Insanity CAN be fun! Its all about how you see it, & whether the CONDITION(s) in control of YOU - or if YOU strong-arm control over your condition away & keep a steely grip on it!
My cold-blooded side is never aggressive or directed or triggered by well-meaning people.
It is a righteous rage. A champion of the weak, defenseless, gentle & innocent.
In short, I detest, despise, & am homicidal toward bullies, sickos, monsters & other deliberately cruel & abusive jerks.
I must avoid them at all costs - because I become calculated, frighteningly calm/controlled/intent, & - well - the logical little me is powerless to control that terrifying entity. It towers menacingly, the muscles of its massive back rippling, powerful shoulders squared, glowering over the world with a black, homicidal, expressionless stare. It is HUGE in me, & incredibly focused - unstoppable.
So, I avoid people like those I mentioned, because I know, Id GIVE them 20 years - without a flinch.
But then - the other side of me is unbelievably loving, empathetic, caring, wise, positive, artistic, gentle, generous, kind, nurturing.
Which side of this enigma will YOU awaken?
Scratched, snapped, snarled, fought, bit , chewed & TORE my way up from poverty, abandonment, mental-physical-emotional abuse, parental alcoholism-drug addiction-mental illness-violence, terror, blackness, forced full adult responsibility for 5 younger siblings from 13 years of age, escape at 17, homelessness, starvation, domestic abuse, utter aloneness, loss of 7 babies (2 fullterm w/ severe physical birth defects), fought fiercely through college, made a name for myself in Hampton Roads radio for years, & best of all - became a mother finally, of my 12 lb. 3 1/2 oz baby boy Ryan, in '82 - now 30 - & every mothers wet dream.
Thank You, loving Great Spirit!
Since, I have survived a vicious arson in '99, lost 5 precious loved ones in this, crawled broken for years after, homeless again, hopeless, became a drug addict in my severe PTSD state, & finally, rose again to my feet, w/ His watchful eye, tender mercies & help from some awesomely wonderful good people out there - & through all of this - I still smile, laugh, & thank my loving Great Spirit above, for never leaving me, providing just enough that I might live, & today, I find my greatest joy in mentoring others who suffer, grieve, & feel as I once did.
I thump NO bibles, need no organized temples, churches, synagogues, mosques, chapels, cathedrals & the like - for HIS universal house of worship is within every soul, every heart, every living thing, the air we breathe, the earth we walk.
But I feel the Great Spirit move my being, mind & heart most, beholding the power & majesty of the awe-inspiring oceans - & when I lift my eyes to His fathomless celestial kingdom, I behold the billowing endlessness of it all - & a hushed trance of rapturous reverie envelops all senses, & - I pray - Soundlessly - & after everything i have survived -
There is Joy.
|Interests:||36: animals, art, blogging, camping, cats, chows, comedy, creativity, dogs, drawing, extraterrestrials, fishing, forests, german shepherds, hiking, hippies, horror, insects, jungles, kindness, life, mountain climbing, nature, navy, norfolk, oceans, painting, paranormal, philosophy, rats, reptiles, rock music, spirituality, ufology, ufos, writing|
|Schools:||Floyd E. Kellam High School - Virginia Beach, VA (1972 - 1975)|
Tidewater Community College - Virginia Beach, VA (1981 - 1983)
|Mutual Friends:||2: lascruces, squeaky|
|Member of:||8: codeshare, dreminem3, fuzzykids, leopards_lair, newcomers, paranormal_news, premium_users, straycatstruttr|
|Account type:||Permanently Insane|